It’s often said that there are “single people” and there are “relationship people,” but the truth often is that everyone is a little bit of both, depending on where they are in their lives. Even single “relationship people” may occasionally have a fun one night stand. And that’s because that’s what they are. They’re fun! Or at least they can be when both of you involved are doing it right.

When you are in the mood to find a girl for the night with no strings attached, most likely you’ll head for a nearby bar. Let’s say you find a hottie, you both begin to click, you begin to flirt, maybe get a little handsy. You can feel a one-night stand is in the forecast and you are excited in more than one way. Things can go south very quickly, though, if you both aren’t following some basic rules tonight.

Be honest

Be honest with what you’re looking to get out of tonight, and make sure she is looking for the same thing. One night stands are about fun sex with no strings attached, so you need to make it clear that that’s all this is and make sure she’s okay with it (and that you’re okay with it too). Which leads into…

Don’t take things personally

Tonight is just about having fun and feeling attractive and awesome, even if you aren’t. If it becomes clear that she isn’t that into you or you’re not that into her from the start, then things can get very awkward very fast if one of you gets bent out of shape about it. On the other hand, if it becomes obvious that you both feel like tonight could lead to something more, then by all means you should discuss it. The proper time for that, however, is after all the fun, casual sex. Not before.

Be safe, in every sense

I hope this is a no-brainer, but wear a damn condom. Even if she says she’s on birth control already, you never know what exactly it is or how careful she is with it. This is a stranger, after all, and you should only trust strangers so far, even if they are naked. Her birth control won’t protect you against STDs either, but your condom will. Read about the effectiveness of condoms. So just wear one, or you’ll be gambling whether the night results in a prescription or a baby. Also, keep your wallet hidden and make sure you pay attention in case something feels off. If something seems wrong with the situation or her, get out of there with everyone’s dignity intact. This brings me to the next rule.

Have an exit strategy

If things go badly, you’ll want to get out of there. Anonymous sex is usually just so-so anyway, so it’d definitely not worth it if you feel unsafe or if you think she wants something way more than agreed upon. You probably shouldn’t just bolt without an explanation though, so make sure you have some sort of excuse or strategy ready to quickly extricate yourself form the sticky situation. Secretly text your buddy and have him call you and say his car broke down and he needs you to pick him up. (There is even an app for it) She’ll probably see right through it, but at least you can both just play the charade without feeling like crap.

Don’t overstay your welcome

If you’re both open and mature about the fact that tonight is only a one-night stand, then it may not be a bad idea to quickly talk about whether you should leave once the deed is done, or if it’s cool to crash in the bed for the night and leave in the morning. Everyone has their own preference. At the very least, casually mention that you plan on leaving tonight and not tomorrow morning. When in doubt, it’s always safer to assume that she doesn’t want to sleep in the same bed as a total stranger, unless it’s clear that she doesn’t mind.

Don’t leave things there

There is a simple trust in one-night stands that you don’t have to see each other or speak to each other again unless you both want to. If you leave something there, then you either have to kiss it goodbye or meet back up wither her again to pick it up. If she had no plan to see you again, now you both have to deal with the awkwardness of meeting up once more because you’re forgetful.

The whole night is guaranteed to be fun if you both just keep it light, fun, and have low expectations. All you have to do is check your ego at the door and be smart, and maybe the night will go better than you expected! But for the love of casual care-free sex, wear a condom.

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